How to deal with stages of grief and find healing
Dawson McAllister
(Radio host and founder of thehopeline.com)
Everyone experiences grief and loss in a different way. Someone may feel numb, sad, afraid, guilty, fearful or a mix of emotions.
Grief is an intensely personal experience and may vary depending on personality, life experience, faith and the nature of the loss. The important thing is to recognize grief so that you are able to begin the healing process.
Some common emotional and physical responses to grief may include one or more of the following:
- Crying or feeling emotionally unstable
- Overwhelming sense of sadness
- Feeling guilty that had you done something the loss could have been avoided
- Anger at yourself, God, doctors or even the person being grieved over
- Fear of death or facing responsibilities alone
- Physical symptoms including fatigue, nausea, panic attacks, lowered immunity, insomnia, weight loss or weight gain
The healing process
When experiencing loss of any kind, it’s important to go through the healing process. Avoiding grief is unhealthy and typically results in someone running away from the loss, and living in a state of anxiety or experiencing avoidance symptoms like depression or suicidal tendencies.
Grief will manifest itself in one way or another and it’s best to experience it fully in order to process it emotionally and find true healing.
A story of grief
I spoke with a young woman named Montana on one of my radio programs, who recently lost her mom. She told me, “I don’t think I’m ever going to get over her death. But I just wish I could take it better.”
I told her that I disagree that she is not going to get over her.
The problem with her statement is it is a negative assertion which is actually sabotaging her healing.
Encouraging words
Here are some encouraging words I shared with her:
““I know it hurts, but…you’re going to have to say: “I’m going to get through this. And with the help of God, I’m going to heal. And in time, it will get better.” I promise you it will get better.””
I would share similar advice with others who think they will “never get better.”
With time and the help of God, your grief can get better. You can heal.
Dawson McAllister was a popular radio host and the founder of the thehopeline.com. To get a free ebook on grief, visit here.
For more help with grief, see Dawson’s article “The Five Stages of Grief” or “Missing Loved Ones.”
For help with prayer, see Asking God for Help.
For how to being a relationship with God, see Knowing God Personally.